I wait at home frying donuts while snow flies and falls outside my kitchen window.
Two women I love more than anything are in different hospitals. Each 30 minutes from where I wait and rest my mind that has ached since I awoke this morning.
One has loved me as her own since I knew her.
The other has loved me as her own because I am.
Neither needing me this day in the place where they are,
I stay in my place and pray.
I rest my thoughts on the words set to worship music coming from the other room. And I ask my Jesus who is always, only good to be patient with me as I look for Him in this day. So willing He is to give spiritual eyes when I ask to see what I seek in the hard places of hard times—glimpses of Him.
Even I am amazed of the absence of fear. The one who’s walked deep and dark the caves of depression, despair and doubt. The one who has known Him long, but not as Protector. A peace my understanding does not understand, rests on me. If only this ache and twitchy eye would also.
I am reminded that not all of me trusts all of Him . . . yet!
Procedures on one body to repair and on the other to explore.
I think of my own soul these past couple years.
Procedures to repair.
Procedures to explore.
Restoring my thinking, my reacting, my default response in living abused, wounded and unjustly treated in an unjust world. Researching my heart, my mind, my flesh of all things contrary to Christ that stand in the way of drawing closer to Him, resembling Him.
My life has been full of my own necessary operations. Specifically cared for by the Great Physician who not only created this clay with my name—but daily presses His image into it.
Each process painful. Every one necessary.
Like those for the ones I love today. Painful, but necessary.
In the days, months, years to come—I have no doubt the surgeries planned for me are many. I will not fear them. I rest. I let go. Knowing the One in control is the One crafting my snowflakes today—each carefully designed and precisely timed to fall.
Nothing slips through His hands.
Nothing can reach me that He has not caused or allowed.
Nothing goes unfiltered.
Nothing escapes His attention.
All surgeries of exploration and repair
have been carefully crafted
and perfectly timed.
I rest unburdened.
I see Him beckon me down the path and believe the difficult worthy.
I thank Him in advance for Faithful Love that results in my victory.
I proclaim His glory.
Grace is dependable like that. He is dependable like that!
I sip my tea, eat a donut, say another prayer & wait for 2 phone calls.
Already seeing with His eyes what I believe to be . . .
victory in Jesus for all of us!
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Linked up with . . . A Steady Rain
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